*grumble grumble*

[joreth]

I am so sick of this stupid argument. If I ever change my mind (and at 32 with no doubts in sight), I will adopt. I've had people tell me that adoption isn't the same thing. I love the look on their face when I respond that *I* am adopted, and would they like to tell my mother that she doesn't *really* love me like my *real* mother would after she's sacrificed and worried and endured hardship for over 30 years, all for the love of the baby she believes that god gave her when her body failed her?

I also say, so what if I change my mind later? Isn’t living with the consequences of our actions all part of being a grown-up? If I change my mind about *having* kids, I can’t reverse the decision, it's not like I can return them to the store.  But if I change my mind about *not* having kids, there are plenty of alternatives available. Including the likelihood that, as I get older, my dating pool will have an increased number of males who already have children.

 

I knew when I was 6, I knew when I was 12, I knew when I was 18, I knew when I was 24, I knew when I had an abortion, I knew when I was 30, and at nearly 33, I STILL know that I DO NOT WANT KIDS and have absolutely no doubts or regrets at not having them. It’s one of the few things about my goals, dreams and plans that has never changed.

How f*cking condescending is it to say “when you meet the right man, you’ll change your mind”. Bull! The “right man” *also* does not want kids.

Thanks datan0de, for the Twitter link!

Comments

[joreth]

Makes total sense to me - it's a big part of why I'm childfree too. Well, that and the whole pregnancy-is-a-parasitic-relationship outlook - that doesn't help, but even with adoption, I care too much about the children's welfare to subject them to me as a mother.

[emanix.livejournal.com]

Heh, I used to actually have nightmares about parasitic lifeforms in my womb when I was younger, but at some point I realised my fear of pregnancy was much more geared around having to look after the damn things after they pop out - for the next eighteen or so years.

I did actually consider surrogacy at one point for a couple who I thought would have been awesome parents, and I might even still do that if another such situation came up, but I absolutely don't want to be a carer, I'm just not built that way.

On the other hand, there are still plenty of kids up for adoption. I just don't think the world *needs* me to breed.