Childfree Dating Site

[joreth]

I was just referred to this site (www.idonotwantkids.com) through the LJ community

childfreepoly . It seems to be a fledgling site and I have yet to determine how poly-friendly it is (there are no glaring red flags so far), but I want to support any dating site that encourages non-traditional relationship styles. And since I happen to *be* Childfree By Choice, I joined, and I'm recommending everyone else who is to join too, whether you want to actively participate or not.

Some of the questions did include a variety of options. For instance, one was phrased as:

do NOT want kids...* (Please complete the sentence)

 

• Ever
  
• For At Least 5 Years
  
• For At Least 10 Years
  
• Of my own, but I would adopt
  
• Until I finish school
  
• Now, but I might want them in the future
  
• Now, but I will definitely want them in the future
  
• Now, but perhaps if I met the right person I would
  

and ...

To clear up any possibility of misunderstanding, what do YOU mean when you say: 'I do NOT want kids?'*

• It means what it says. I do NOT have kids, I do NOT want to date someone with kids, and I do NOT ever want to have any kids with anyone.
  
• It means that it's ok if you already have kids, but I just don't want any of my own.
  
• It means that I already have kids, and it's ok if you do, I just don't want them to tag along on our dates.
  
• It means that I do not currently have kids and I do not want to marry someone that already has any either, but I do want us to have kids together one day.
  
• It means that I do not want to date anybody with children, because I do not want to raise another person's child, but it's different if you are a widow with children.
  

So I think this site has some potential.   The bulk of the questions center around sex, money, and kids, as the owner feels these are the statistically most stressful aspects of relationships.  Several of the questions did not leave options for "none of the above", but each section has a box where you can address anything you want that wasn't covered in the questions, including elaborating on the above questions in that section.

So I highly recommend checking this site out.  It's fine that many people want to have kids, but I'm tired of things being weighted so heavily in favor of those who want kids and against those of us who do not, for instance, many dating sites don't have the question of kids as a searchable option.  It's a waste of both the Childfree person's time and the person hoping to start a family to not be able to filter each other out.  And the options this site gives doesn't necessarily make the same mistake in reverse of discriminating against those in favor of kids, by allowing us to customize what, exactly, Childfree means to us individually. 

*EDIT - I just did a profile search to find my matches, and they do offer the options of "seeking: man/woman/couple/group", so that speaks well for the poly options

Comments

[femetal.livejournal.com]

I intended to create a profile, but I found the categories to be too narrow. Because wanting to remain childfree hasn't been an obstacle for me in dating thus far, I'm not willing to pigeonhole myself just for the sake of upping their numbers.

I find OKCupid does a fine job of helping filter through that stuff, and it lets me be incredibly flexible in defining myself, which is important to me.

Thanks for the heads-up, though. Give me a couple of years, and I might change my mind. ;)

[joreth]

I definately believe that OKC is by far the best dating site out there for their flexibility and available options. For some reason, I continue to get harassed by people who are the antithesis of what I want in a partner, and that includes the whole childfree issue, so I'll give this one a try. I'm also not actively looking for new partners, being fairly polysaturated at the moment, but I'm not totally closed off to the right person or persons :-D which should make this experiment interesting!