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Between sitcoms that deal with trans issues and people I've met in real life, I just don't get why people have to make trans people's transitions into something about them. Like, every story I hear about people (usually white men) getting angry about finding out someone they knew has transitioned (or is going to transition, or is in the process of transitioning), it's all about the cis person's feelings. Other people being trans is somehow offensive to the angry cis person because they make the other person's transition all about them. And as the trans person tries to explain, each part of the explanation is met with more anger at how it is somehow about the cis person.
And telling them that it has nothing to do with them, that it's all about the trans person, that doesn't help. Because then they get offended at the idea that they have nothing to do with it - that it's not about them, that it's not affected or influenced by them at all. Like the trans person is doing something *to spite* them by not considering their feelings at all.
Dudes! It's not about you, it has nothing to do with you, and you have no rights to any sort of connection to their process or experience.
I just don't get this sense of betrayal people feel at finding out that someone they know is trans. Nobody betrayed you. Even them not telling you about it when you think you should have been notified is not a betrayal. YOU ARE NOT PART OF THIS EQUATION AT ALL.
Just ... WTF dude? I know I just said that telling them that it's not about them just continues to offend them because how dare someone not consider how THEY might feel about hearing the news, but srsly, WTF dude?
YOU ARE JUST NOT THAT IMPORTANT. You can't have been "betrayed" because IT HAS NOTHING THE FUCK TO DO WITH YOU.
Just ...
there's no point to this, I'm just watching TV and remembering a conversation I had with someone I met recently IRL, and it's all just irritating the fuck out of me, so I'm venting.
I can't even wrap my brain around the amount of arrogance and egocentrism it takes to feel *betrayed* at what someone else does with their own body. My mom got pissed off at my dad for getting a tattoo when he turned 50. I didn't understand that either. What people do with their bodies has fuck-all to do with me, or with you. And I can't fathom having my head stuck so far up my own ass as to think it might.
And telling them that it has nothing to do with them, that it's all about the trans person, that doesn't help. Because then they get offended at the idea that they have nothing to do with it - that it's not about them, that it's not affected or influenced by them at all. Like the trans person is doing something *to spite* them by not considering their feelings at all.
Dudes! It's not about you, it has nothing to do with you, and you have no rights to any sort of connection to their process or experience.
I just don't get this sense of betrayal people feel at finding out that someone they know is trans. Nobody betrayed you. Even them not telling you about it when you think you should have been notified is not a betrayal. YOU ARE NOT PART OF THIS EQUATION AT ALL.
Just ... WTF dude? I know I just said that telling them that it's not about them just continues to offend them because how dare someone not consider how THEY might feel about hearing the news, but srsly, WTF dude?
YOU ARE JUST NOT THAT IMPORTANT. You can't have been "betrayed" because IT HAS NOTHING THE FUCK TO DO WITH YOU.
Just ...
there's no point to this, I'm just watching TV and remembering a conversation I had with someone I met recently IRL, and it's all just irritating the fuck out of me, so I'm venting.
I can't even wrap my brain around the amount of arrogance and egocentrism it takes to feel *betrayed* at what someone else does with their own body. My mom got pissed off at my dad for getting a tattoo when he turned 50. I didn't understand that either. What people do with their bodies has fuck-all to do with me, or with you. And I can't fathom having my head stuck so far up my own ass as to think it might.
