Help Out A Nice Guy?

[joreth]

So, there's a guy on OKC who posted in a forum, who wants to know if girls prefer sincere, innovative, private messages.  He even posted a couple examples.  The reason why I'm making a journal post about it is because he's being blased by both men and women for this effort.  All the men tell him that he's just a loser and all the women are critizing him for asking question, talking about himself, and writing long emails.

I think this is a damn shame.  There are few enough men out there who take the time to read a profile and tailor their emails to match the girl they're trying to contact that I think this poor guy deserves a little positive encouragement, even if it comes from people who aren't personally interested in him.

So I responded that I *do* like personal, sincere messages.  Then *I* got jumped on for liking it!  It's very sad.

So, I implore everyone who reads my journal, if you appreciate a sincere, thoughtful first-contact email, please go let this poor kid know that there *are* some people who understand respect.

http://www.okcupid.com/forum?low=1&tid=11880214649459875547

Comments

[phyrra.livejournal.com]

I responded positively.

[joreth]

Thanks. I think it's a shame that a guy with good intentions is getting so much shit. He's currently being picked on for not knowing how to use the html break tag. You'd think that I'd learn not to argue with idiots on the internet, but I *so* need that xkcd poster about not going to bed because someone is wrong on the internet!

[terriaminute.livejournal.com]

I commented too.

Humans can be very irritating. Sometimes [info]datan0de 's plan to rule with robots seems the more sane choice, you know? :-)

[joreth]

Thanks. Yep, it's people like those in the forums that have made me so contrary online and make me hide in my room for days on end, not leaving until I'm forced to for food or work. I just hated to see that kid get slammed for doing, basically, a decent thing - trying to indicate that he values the individuality of the women he approaches. We need more men like that and fewer women who punish those who do.

[terriaminute.livejournal.com]

Well, yes, WE need men who are able and willing to care and communicate. But then, we are not victims of our society. Tragically, too many women are.

And too many men are, too.

Now if we could just get them to leave US alone...

[femetal.livejournal.com]

I sent a direct message, because I didn't want my comment to get lost in the hundreds of others... Also, I'm not big on getting into arguments on the forums, because they're so heavily trolled.

[joreth]

That's a good point, and since my goal is to reward him for his behaviour, that certainly fits the end goal!

[petite-lambda.livejournal.com]

I sent him a message, too -- thanks for the idea. Saw it as a hint to finally open a OKC account (been planning to do it for a while).
The negative reactions surprised me so much! A person reading your profile and asking you questions can be a turnoff for some people... I just don't get it! :-/