Y'know guys, we can tell when you write a form letter. At least some of us can. And some of us are not nice about it and we'll tell everyone else in the community about you. Eventually, your reputation will proceed you and your form letter will be laughed at around the internet before you even have a chance to send it.
READ THE FUCKING PROFILES FIRST! I don't know how many times I have to say this before ya'll get a clue.
I received a form letter that was quite a bit longer than my usual form letter. But it was still a form letter. And I could tell. I refuse to believe that I'm the most intelligent women on OKC and I'm the only one who can sniff out a form letter, spam, or a fake profile. So if I can tell it's bullshit, I can't be the only one. The difference between me and most of the other women, however, is that I will broadcast it all over the internet.
Before I actually get to the letter I received (as you all should know by now I will publish it), let me relate a story. Some idiot emailed me not to long ago and I published the corresondence as I usually do. And before anyone comments ... again ... that I should lighten up or I'll never meet anyone, OKC is the only "dating" site I'm on, and I'm there for the tests. Occasionally I do meet worthwhile people (3 of my current boyfriends and 1 friendly-ex are there too), but that's sort of like a bonus to me, not the point. I am also on a "matchmaking" site that is geared towards polyamorists, but again, I'm not there to meet people - that site has another feature I like ... the forums.
I spend a lot of time arguing in the forums and basically making a pain in the ass of myself with my unpopular opinions. So here I am, browsing through the threads, when I come across a comment from a woman who received an email from a guy on that site. She used a couple of phrases that sounded disturbingly familiar. A couple of comments down, I see another woman chiming in saying that it sounded a lot like an email *she* just received, and she gave a couple of other quotes. I went back through my inbox, and sure enough, those exact phrases were located in my email too. So I cross-posted the journal entry regarding this particular loser on that site as well (I had previously posted it OKC and here on my livejournal).
What this story means is that this guy is now known on 3 of the major meeting websites for writing a form letter, and specific phrases from his form letters are being published all over the internet so that his form letters will be recognized as form letters before he even tries to approach someone new.
So, let's just say, in your spamming of ladies on the internet, you just happen to avoid me and one of the many other women who chat about our experiences in a public forum. All the other women get your email, find nothing of interest in it because it's so incredibly generic (it has to be, in order to apply to thousands of women), or it is clearly obvious that it's a form letter because in its effort to avoid sounding generic, it says certain details that show you haven't actually read their profile (asking what she does for a living when she says so in her profile is a dead giveway, btw). So at best, you've managed to alienate a bunch of women who might have actually responded back if your initial contact email were simply just personalized and showed some effort that you want to get to know *her*, not just any woman online. At worst, you've contacted me or someone like me, and you've been passed around the internet, name and contact information and all, and all other women have been warned away from you before you can meet them and win them over with your stunningly bland personality.
So, on to the latest MisAdventures of Online Skeezballs (I was very nice, but if he responds with more idiocy, that will change and I'll be sure to post that too):
Subject line: Hello sexy
Hello how are u doin?
it take me a great pleasure to use my private and busy period in jotting this note, we'll i come a cross ur profile and it make me amazine.I`m 41, single and live on my own. Working on the house making it comfortable. Employed most days. In the evenings go to the gym, sauna, play tennis, go for bike ride or watch TV for a bit. I look after myself, like to feel clean and fresh and stay relaxed and in control. Try to lead an active energetic life and stay fit and healthy.
Im 41 and fit / active. I enjoy a wide variety of interests. I am very warm and loving. By nature I am easy going ,tolerant and loyal. I do not tell lies and if the truth hurts then so be it. I do not like being on this system but hopefully it will be a means to an end to find that special lady.
i am kind,considerate and very loving.i am looking for the same in a woman.im not looking for a "rich chick",but as long as my partner has an occupation,we could have a good life together.she does not have to be accademic but she can be.i work 45-50 hours a week as a businessman . just looking for someone who is normale like me i sometimes feel a little insecure and need someone to give me a cudlel now and then if i find the right person for me i give a 100 TO THE RELATIOSHIP.NO LOOKING FOR ONE NIGHTSTAND someone to share the ups and downs with in life i want to start a new chapter in my life and want to share it with someone if things click. i promise to love u fully walking hand to hand in the future we are about to creat pls babe i wan't u to know that i will never love any order person but only if u could trust in me and believe that i will be alway be there for u. i wan't u to tell me ur opinion and also send me ur mail box, add me to your yahoo IM id so that we can chat and know more about each other..here is my id firstname.lastname@example.org@yahoo.com.......... colvin
I REALLY suggest you read people's profiles before sending out your form letters and I REALLY suggest you read mine in particular so that you fully understand what you got yourself into by contacting me.
So, let's play a game. Feel free to play at home, participating online isn't necessary unless you really want to. Can you find all the signs this is a pre-written "form" letter? Can you identify all the signs that says he didn't actually read my profile? I'll give you a hint ... the first sign is in the subject line. When I can tell it's a form letter before I even open it ... you're doing something very very wrong.